# summer of nfr 81 evil woman by elo now plays in the lab background our new favorite humalien soon finds out our awful control freak mother doesn't like them we never find out why probably the fact mother dear is a total control freak sees our new friend as threat to their iron grip on our nowhere suburban half life moms soon stops us from borrowing their car at at weekends so now we and our favorite humalien can't escape we're both desperate to get out of our parent's houses not homes have also been recently banned from going up to their room by their parents as according to them no lie the sound of our hot scientific sax interrupts their daily soap operas elvischrist we cannot and refuse to believe these turgid air wasting bags of flaccid undead gristle were ever beautiful youthful or knew true love we were leaning against a high brick wall with interesting grey moss gently growing on it when the bad news arrived we're moving to old brighton they say no way we reply when what how why this bad news wasn't exactly out of blue however swanson didn't want to get some crap weekend job wanting to make their psycho mother pay in all ways so neither of them ever had any money to go anywhere this with henry constantly crying about their dysfunctional home life was making their situation worse still swanson's tender scientific soul was crushed and heartbroken they tell us they're going in two months but from now till then we should stop seeing one another what the ever loving shed why and why now to say henry wasn't ready for this was a biocosmic understatement all they'd told us about themselves the sheer intensity of what we'd shared all the tears and private laughter it was as though now it meant nothing so one day we're heading on out toward blumquist video store where they work part time we wanted to go into town anyway far from our arthole parents we arrive and notice though store window they're talking to random video rental store employee number 1050b chatting in a way their current heavy scientific lover looking in through darkened safety glass from across the street might sense was more than merely friendly some random skinny insect with a bright pearly smile and happening anime hair parted on one side we start to feel physically sick suddenly crushed under the intense high pressure psychic ruination of the unfolding situation we wanted to stride in there and calmly pull this guat's human mask off we've only just been brighton dumped yet our beloved is already looking for that special someone else is that it oh wait a second unless of course they've been seeing them long before today the dirty penny suddenly drops oh swanson you poor native low wattage schmuck it suddenly occurs that it's probably been like this between them for a while eventually our love says goodbye to loverboy and goes home for lunch we then proceed to stroll in there and join video club which was our plan all along just to join the darn suburban video rental club it was only by chance swanson caught them laughing together video rental store employee doesn't know us from their dad and beams merrily unconscious shark bait vrse: how can we help you today sir here at blumquist video we've a fine selection of action adventure bad sci fi 70's low budget italian gore flicks and light hearted comedy romance movies the employee appears so darn innocent and clueless as the mightly rollins states it just wouldn't have been good plan to execute akin to smearing out a bunny your idiot friend finds cute with a runaway concrete nibbler while your both out looking for existential bargains in semi disposable elf assembly swedish furniture heck we mean it's hardly worth permanently damaging brainless weak morons whose existential anthems are ripped from soundtracks to juno or amelie swanson half choking: we'd ackk like to join blumquist video club please we smile tight lipped staring though them over the lightly scratched beige plastic counter employee guy 1050b unconsciously feels bit weirded out by something supermassive and terrible burning ten miles behind our eyes of polished black onyx but hands us the standard twelve pages of signup forms in an efficient and friendly manner we fill them out give a photo driver's license birth certificate take an eye fingerprint foot and dna scan and ten minutes later they hand us back a freshly laminated holographic blumquist video club members card bye now they say as we exit premises with a bad unrewound japanese format video taped copy of george andrew romero's undead classic day of the deaders in our sweating red right hand two weeks later we find out everything about them our only true love tells us they've quote made a new friend at work oh you sweet two faced liar no wonder your last partner dropped you like a dirty potato sack of red hot fibs as they say the words we feel our jaw tightening how could you do this to us how we ask silently oh ragged disappointment oh crushing existential weight of naked falsehood turns out guy smiley's even a massive flan of of hyperkult sci fi lite tv series stir dreck oh man a drekkie of all creatures they own the uniform a matching ray gun holster and travel hundreds of miles to every stir dreck convention our only humalien our only slim tender love has dumped us for a bad lukewarm shatner lookalike oh big science hear our heartfelt cry at high desert mesa dusk our pathetic little life is over please just beam us back up and knock us out thankfully the vhs movie kicked much arts fellow researcher k0de blue at start of the big munching scene at end just said: ahh man we thought this a most suitable response and imagine loverboy screaming while being passively yet enthusiastically chewed by hordes of rotting blue grey ash faced undead static bad print aged video tape over saturation and scan lines on a low dot pitch monitor the general lofi look of the film caused by unique technical limitations and obsolete film recording media along with the overall moody lighting making the scene far more convincing horrible and darkly hilarious the overall effect is one of stumbling onto another entirely different universe one that was perfectly aligned with this one a reality one hardly suspected could exist heck yeah a near future retro 80's big scientific republic // [[republic of bob contents | imaginary pastime republic of bob]]