# life as an embarrassment
as somebody's baby by jackson browne now plays in the lab background
researcher henry swanson overhead halfway: given previous emotional encounters there does exist mutual attraction they've more than enough myfakeface friends and lovers thanks and has already hinted as much during recent polite insubstantial social communiques
while apparently they do see beauty in a multiplicity of passions apparently they're not actively seeking more partners at the moment
not actively seeking who talks like that
what is this a multi million dollar business deal
do they regularly check a wall chart casually firing a million workers like it was nothing
a single smooth manicured finger moves down a chart
let's see umm nope we've already a million plastic friends and lovers
no more today thanks get back in line
hardly surprising however given the sum total of one's conversations with them were really just them speaking about themselves for hours
they only asked two questions the whole time neither giving a real impression they cared
more just a convenient way to transition back into talking about their amazing upright and perfectly normalized life / style
after a few weeks of this there was the strong impression one only existed as a convenient listening post a set of dumb ears
as if they were desperate to maintain the outward impression of somehow being an more evolved and compassionate new age bs version of oneself
yet all that existed was some malfunction of the animal as symbolic entity
a cardboard fool sits opposite half trying to listen staring out from a thousand miles inside their empty skull
bursting with yeasty slow boiling desire
noting short hair the neck the mouth
oh the pain of apparent duality arrrgg
alone way back in their lousy secret underground rnd lab researcher henry swanson covers their eyes loudly moaning
you ask if i like you well what can i say
you know that i do yet this is a strange imaginary play state we both play
only ever a billionth of a degree away from where we truly are as humaliens
where we stand right now in actual lousy concrete reality
so near and far away from you also known as nowhere nobody and nothing
// [[republic of bob contents | imaginary pastime republic of bob]]