↑ [[2024-08]] ← [[2024-W33]] ## Overview Bulk of week in Raleigh where weather has cooled down into comfort zone, mid-80s with some nights in high 50s. Worked in Five Points through first half of the week then West Raleigh, driving up to Cashiers on Friday. ## Projects #### New York Trip Geological points of interest: Central Park, Umpire Rock-Hartland formation, Carousel-Manhattan formation. Boro Hall Park, Bronx: baseball field is where formations meet. Both are remnant of collision during Taconic orogeny. #### Design Proposal Template Slowly working my way toward a design development proposal template. Not as straightforward as the initial template since this phase is so much more project-specific. #### Site Assessment Worksheet Tweaking layout and fill colors. Data proving hard to come by that does not require tedious input. Currently debating whether this is a useful product for clients. I think it fits in with the overall business mission to reorient clients toward thinking about their home as as complex adaptive system within a complex adaptive system. But is this something they want? Or rather what I believe is necessary in order to live according to a value of community wellness? #### An Unquiet Mind Working through the beginnings of [[How I Measure Wealth]] and organizing new related thoughts. Eventually these long form assays will have their own site, but for now they are available in the garden. #### Happy Chance Quick walkthrough of [[property]] on Friday to check status of July spraying. Huge success. Estimate about 90% of historic problem areas are free of vines with minimal damage to surrounding plants. Landscape in general much more [[Legibility|legible]]. Other areas where vines sprouting up and a few that were missed in the initial treatment, but easy to see now that most have cleared. Will set a reminder next season to revisit and reapply treatment if necessary. Spent Saturday morning weeding in garden beds around house and spot treating problem areas for oriental bittersweet. Application of triclopyr has better success rate than expected. This is most likely now a task that needs to occur once or twice per growing season to kill upstart vines. Next step is clearing brush from orchard and planting mother colonies to boost woodland diversity, then seed a ground cover. ## Topics #### Landscape Information Modeling Despite having this topic at edge of consciousness for a number of years, I have yet to capture any of my thoughts. Using the ISO definition, "_Use of a shared digital representation of a built asset to facilitate design, construction and operation processes to form a reliable basis for decisions._" I would argue that LIM is an extension of BIM in that it incorporates the characteristics of a site and how the footprint of a facility influences the dynamics upon it over time. Further, LIM projects management costs over the course of a project's lifetime and responds to how certain design elements on site might create or mitigate long-term expenses. Example: In addition to the economic cost of clearing a site, a LIM could calculate the costs due to lack of ecosystem services, such as HVAC savings due to shade, and/or the savings over time from planting shade trees. Additional variables can be applied depending on the project. Grocery savings from soil productivity. Maintenance savings from naturalistic plantings. Etc. A LIM could be attached to the deed of a property and transferred with ownership, so that economic value and ecosystem services are included in the communal context. #### Geology First snowball earth represents the end of the Archean eon and beginning of Proterozoic eon. Second snowball earth, Great Unconformity, and Cambrian explosion mark beginning of current eon, the Phanerozoic. This eon is divided into eras and periods, each generally marked by either the emergence of a distinct life form, or by a mass extinction. The Paleozoic era, Mesozoic era, and Cenozoic era are all defined by dominance of a particular life form. #### Business Development Considering the possibility of applying for a mentor through the Secretary of State business dev website or similar resource. A way to create accountability for myself and get an objective perspective on how to grow, etc. Real issue will be finding someone who can keep up with my pace of thought, direct me into the most relevant priority, and be patient with my anxiety. #### Facticity Thinking about this concept this morning as it relates to attachment and identity. Sartre's argument is that one can transcend their facticity through contemplation of being and [[negatité|nothingness]] (I think). #### Economics Regulating wealth is generally not a politically viable platform. But what if we instead regulated [[hyperagency]]? IE: We limit the ability of the [[uber-rich]] to shape policy and culture according to their [[Belief|beliefs]], at least without a broader consensus. The principle here is that one individual's ability to extend their personal [[agency]] beyond their immediate needs threatens the personal agency of others and should be monitored/regulated/checked. ## Reflections #### 2024-08-19 Sky very active the past few days and its toll on my psyche is palpable. And yet the flow of my inner life has returned. Thoughts arise and fall away, many emotionally charged, some I follow to their conclusion, others I let pass like leaves in a stream. I note experiences that are synchronous and others that are disturbing, but the judgement of myself within those experiences is gone. Positive experiences are not indicative of my uniqueness, nor are negative experiences indicative of my worthlessness. They are simply pleasant or unpleasant within the context of how they emerge and my emotional state. The place of [[deep okayness]] persists in the stillness of my composure. Above it lies a budding faith in life's unfolding. The outcome is unknown, but the confidence in its momentum is logically sound. I am not always able to occupy this state of mind, and I do not always trust its outcome, but this is more indicative of [[grasping]] at a desire than patience with the process. How to cultivate the presence to stay with this faith in the chaos wrought by living? #### 2024-08-20 Lay back in bed after yoga this AM. Up by 0830 and in the office by 0900, even with lunch prep. I enjoy the freedom of defining my own schedule and adjust it to how I may feel any given day. Recovery from my disappointment with her still ongoing, though the bounce-back is complete. Now it is in process of how to approach life with her in my orbit at work and whether or not to engage as a friend. I'm experiencing the tension between desire and self-care. I continue to feel the pull toward her that I experienced in the winter and spring, but now resisting because the outcome of exploring it was a continuous cycle of getting gut-punched by the reminder of being Unwanted. #### 2024-08-22 Feeling a lot of movement and loss of inhibition in the writing/publishing process. Enjoying a number of elements in it. First, the knowledge that no one is actually reading whats written, so there's no accountability to quality other than what I choose to bring to it. Second, the recognition of the transitive nature of the note. It can evolve and incorporate itself into other forms of knowledge. Once an assay is on the publish deck it can decompose into other topics. The idea remains as an artifact of a moment in time, but not etched in stone. Merely a record. An exploration of what was known at the time of writing. #### 2024-08-23 Early AM on the porch having a coffee before heading off to yoga. Heading to mountains for the weekend for last round of Garlon treatments in orchard. Fitful night of sleep, thinking about her and the lack of ability to take action despite having a good amount of clarity on my feelings and my attraction. Realizing it’s just a mystery to be lived and doing my best to surrender to it. As a whole, I am confident I’ve managed myself gently in spite of navigating the personal dimensions of the rejection, and confident that conciliation and rapprochement will organize itself eventually, though I’d prefer it happen sooner than later. I’ve not been afforded any option other than to carry on with life as I know it, which is certainly pleasant and rewarding in the present moment. ## Astrology - **2024-08-18:** Mercury square Uranus, Mercury Rx cazimi - **2024-08-19:** Venus square Jupiter, Venus opposite Saturn, Jupiter square Saturn, Sun square Uranus, Aquarius Full Moon - **2024-08-20:** Sun square [[nChiron]], Uranus conjunct nChiron - **2024-08-22:** [[The Sun|Sun]]→[[Virgo]], [[Jupiter]] trine [[nSaturn]] - **2024-08-23:** [[Venus]] square [[Mars]] - **2024-08-24:** Mercury sextile Mars