- A major realization I've had last week:
- I've been running away from difficult emotions for years and years
- Especially from feeling [[My mothers death in 2018
sadness]], [[Traumatic Experience at Work|disappointment]] and [[The abusive friendship with IM 1989|anger]]
- The problem is that when I numb those feelings, all other feelings are also numbed
- You can't selectively numb specific feelings
- So, instead of running away from them, I've decided to
- Step TOWARDS all feelings I'm experiencing
- WELCOME all feelings, especially the ones I've tried to lock away
- PROVIDE energy, safe space and hopefully OUTLETS for all feelings I'm experiencing
### Creating safe time and space for myself
- This has been the most important first step towards being able to handle difficult emotions
- I've set aside two moments of time every day to simply be with myself, actively (not watching TV).
- 1 hour right after getting out of bed ("Sadhana")
- 1 hour before going to bed
- Often I do Yoga and practice my headstand with my [[FeetUp Headstand Tool]] because it gets me in the moment quickly
- I also am grateful for [[My soft and squishy fitness mat]] which makes practicing all other types of Yoga so much easier
- I've also cleaned the room and added nice lighting to create a relaxed and safe atmosphere
- Anchoring myself, my day, with myself has helped me have the resources and the focus to actually allow difficult feelings to arise
### Releasing anger
- Anger is an emotion that I never learned to deal with
- Growing up, anger was a taboo
- Anger was 'spritiually bypassed' with the idea of 'love and peace'
- I need to find a non-structured, destructive and safe way to release it
- Smash old wood in the forest (TBD)
- Build and smash a DIY punching-bag at home (TBD)
- Collect random things (glasses, mirrors, old electronics,etc.) and smash them with a baseball bat
### Embracing sadness
- [[⭐️ Kinesiotape for Psychological Well-Being – Experiment (S21 Mini-Project)]]
### Managing disappointment
- TBD
![[IMG20210731151432.jpg]]
![[IMG20210731151437.jpg]]
![[IMG20210731151516.jpg]]
## Related
- [[⭐️ My mothers death in 2018]]