Status:: #🌱 Tags:: #🎓 Links:: [[My Lectures]] ___ # Role of sex in pair bonding Course:: [[HD 3620 Human Bonding]] ## Summary Sexual feelings and love are two separate feelings. However, in romantic relationships they are related. The more we have sex with someone the more attached we become to them as oxytocin sensitizes us to dopamine and dishabituates us to opiates. ## Notes ### What is dopamines role in sexual pair bonding? Dopamine is released in anticipation of having sexual intercourse as well as during the sexual intercourse itself. ### What opiates role in sexual pair bonding? Opiates make us feel satisfied, sated, and content and they are released during and especially after sexual intercourse. ### What is oxytocin's role in sexual pair bonding? Oxytocin makes us feel close, comfortable, and trusting. **Oxytocin sensitizes you to dopamine and reduces your habituation to opiates.** ### How does having sex with the same person repeatedly affect the longevity of their relationship? It makes it very likely the relationship will evolve into something else, either a committed one or one that breaks up. ### What is a common break up point in relationships? A common break up point in a relationship is the point when romantic infatuation ends usually 18 to 24 months afterward.  This is because of oxytocins relation to sensitizing us to dopamine and reducing habituation to opiates. Over time after having sex with the same person this effect stacks up. ### How do break ups affect you depending on the phase of a relationship you were in when it ended? If you broke up while in the romantic infatuation phase you are more likely to feel down, where as if you break up after the romantic infatuation phase you are more likely to feel down. ### How can we have healthier polyamorous relationships with this in mind? Some people in these types of relationships put these rules into effect: 1. No having sex with the same person again and again 2. No having sex with people in the social group 3. No kissing or hand holding after sex ### What are some of the theories for why our generation is having less sex compared to previous generations?  ### Is our species naturally monogamous? Ethnologists when uncovering if a species is monogamous or promiscuous look at these attributes. Let’s see if they align with humans: - Penile Bone: Having a penile bone allows you to penetrate with basically no interaction with the female. If you don’t you must be aroused. This makes easy sex harder and promotes monogamy. - Larger teste size indicates promiscuous species because larger promiscuous species need more sperm to compete against other sperm cells from other males. Humans have competitive sperm. Interestingly if a partner physically leaves their partner like going to a different country, their sperm production goes up. - Covert ovulation (meaning ovulation isn’t advertised) indicates monogomous relationships because you have to hang around people for longer to be likely to get them pregnant. However recent research suggests we aren’t as covert as we think. For example, clothing of women, unconscious liking of women more who are in ovulation as shown in the lap dance study. - The fact that we have sex just for fun is heavily conducive of a monogamous relationship. - Sexual behavior showcasing multiple sexual partners obviously indicates promiscuous behavior. A point for humans being promiscuous. - Greater sexual dimorphism is indicative of promiscuity. Humans are moderately sexually dimorphic. - Paternal care refers to time and effort given by fathers to offspring. Another point for humans monogamy. - Separation distress means partners get distress if you separate them. Another point for humans monogamy. The research indicates that humans are a socially monogamous species but can be sexually promiscuous. They are completely different.